he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
