My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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