Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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