I wanna passion pit in your ass
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Randomize
