Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
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