fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
