who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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