operation harelip BJ is a go
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
