Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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