Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
