its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
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