I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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