Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
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