Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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