I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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