We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
is wine microwaveable?
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
