just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
