well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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