week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Randomize
