so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
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