Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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