I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
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