I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Is her dick bigger than yours?
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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