Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
