maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
