I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Randomize
