pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
why does every cop we meet know your name?
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
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