If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
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