That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
