The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
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