Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
