If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I'm at about main and main street
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
