you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
