Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize
