Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Dicks are not precious.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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