Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Randomize
