:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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