i may or may not be watching the land before time
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Randomize
