He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
