can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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