how hairy? two words: wookie tits
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
