How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
