doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
