You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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