You really coming over, don't trick.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
there is glitter all over my balls
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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