Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
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