Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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