I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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