You just made me feel so damn special
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
