Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
